& I thought the notecard questions were insolent...

Here is another awesome email from one of my lil brainiacs. This person actually sent this to me twice, 1st as a reply to a mass email I sent a week ago & the second time as a stand-alone message. Neither time did /she actually sign it. In case you are wondering why s/he calls me "Don," it is because I often sign my emails "Don Samuel"--i.e. it is a title & not my 1st name. I'm not sure this person knows this or not. Please understand that this is a student who didn't come to the midterm (nor send an email or call ahead) and just popped back into class the following Wednesday. I offered to let him/her take a make-up on Friday, s/he agreed. When I arrived Friday, guess what s/he was sitting around doing at this desk in the Foreign Languages Office? If you guessed "studying," You're Dead Wrong. S/he was Texting. TEXTING!! Needless to say, s/he was CLEARLY not ready to take the midterm, so I allowed him/her until Monday to prepare. This is also someone who hasn't passed ANYTHING besides one quiz (and I think I was probably drunk when i graded it, so it's most likely a mistake on my part than studying on his/hers). S/he scraped by on the midterm & decided NOT to drop the class (against my advice). So now, without any further ado, comes this (file it under: give an inch & they try to take a mile)

Hey Don

  Check it out. I just got word that I have a doctors (doctor's, you mean) appointment for Monday at 2:30pm. (Our class is at 2:00pm) Its (It's or it is) really difficult for me to get these appoinments so I have to go when they fit me in. I know we have a test on Monday and I am trying to do better then the stunt I pulled during the exam and let you know as soon as I know. (Have YOU ever heard of a doctor's office that gave out appointments on Sunday??) I will be able to provide a doctors excuse from their office. If your (you're or you are) not cool with letting me make up the test I respect that as you have already done it once (actually twice, if you think about it) but I want you to let me know the verdict. (No, you really don't) I resent (re-sent, you mean?) it cause (because, you mean) I did not change the subject in the reply email and I did not want you to think I was that lazy. (TOO LATE)

This is me again. Le Sigh. I haven't answered this yet. I would appreciate some suggestions here. I am completely at a loss. Every time I try, I just end up typing "PLEASE DROP THIS CLASS & STOP MAKING ME GRADE THIS NONSENSE YOU ARE NOT EVEN TRYING TO STUDY" or some variant thereof.....